Second Thoughts
by dancingkatz
Summary: Originally written for the Snape in a Towel challenge at OWL. A humourous look at a night not too long after Snape is appointed as Potions Master.


**Disclaimer: All characters and locations are **

**Second Thoughts**

_By Dancingkatz_

It had _not_ been a good day.

Severus Snape, the relatively newly appointed Potions Master for Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, growled to himself as he strode away from the staff room. Actually, it had been horrendous. Not only had there been a disaster in each and every class (Well, he'd expected the one from Nichols; if a day passed when that boy didn't melt or blow something up he'd have to check himself into St. Mungo's Annex for the Perpetually Astonished) but Dumbledore had insisted that he join the rest of the staff for the after dinner card game.

It wasn't that he disliked playing cards. He disliked having to pretend camaraderie with people who made no effort to hide their distrust of him. Not to mention that he usually ended up losing a significant portion of his pay packet in these games. Somehow, any game he played in turned from a "nice friendly little game" into a high stakes ruthless bloodletting.

_And the alcohol thatgoes along with it!_ He sneered as he opened the door from the secret passage into his own quarters. If the students only knew that Minerva McGonagall had to cast multiple sobriety and anti-hangover spells every morning before leaving her rooms to teach… The worst thing about it was that alcohol made her libidinous and there was nothing more disgusting than a 50-year old witch acting like a lust sick 20-year old. And of course tonight she'd decided to pick _him_ for her flirtations.

His skin itched just remembering it. He crossed to his private bathroom and with a flick of his wand the tub filled with steaming hot water. At least she wouldn't be able to follow him in _here_.

An hour later, considerably relaxed and feeling definitely cleaner, he exited the tub. He dried himself and reached for a clean robe… which wasn't there. Cursing, he realized that he'd been so intent on ridding himself of the reminders of the evening that he hadn't stopped to retrieve a clean robe from his wardrobe. He wrapped the towel around his waist and reached for his wand only to have it dance away from his reaching fingers.

Cursing again, he muttered "_Accio_ wand!" but it didn't co-operate in the slightest. It danced in the air, and moved from the bathroom into his bedroom, staying just out of his reach.

Forgetting about the robe, he lunged towards the wand and this time successfully grabbed it, ending up sprawled across the end of his bed.

A sudden burst of feminine laughter startled him and the towel which had loosened during his chase after his wand slipped to the floor.

"_Expelliarmus_!" He pointed his wand directly in front of himself and was horrified to see a semi-undressed Minerva McGonagall appear—well mostly appear-as the spell knocked her wand out of her hand and blew open what could only be an invisibility cloak.

"What the hell are you doing here!" he snarled. Her only response was a drunken giggle and wave of her fingers. Suddenly realizing the indignity of his position and his state of undress he hastily summoned the towel and retreated to the bathroom.

He summoned a robe from the wardrobe and hastily dressed, keeping a watchful eye on the inebriated Transfiguration professor. He had to get her out of his quarters but was reluctant to approach her. He quickly considered and rejected several options before smiling grimly.

"_Obliviate_! _Stupefy_!" The woman slumped to the floor, an expression of surprise on her face. Sighing, Severus bent over her and about passed out from the whisky fumes. No, as much as his preferred to avoid using unnecessary spells, this was a time where the extra expenditure of magic was worth it.

"_Mobilicorpus_!" He maneuvered her out through the secret passage and out into the corridor. It only took a few minutes to get her where he wanted her. Of course, her invisibility cloak proved useful since if anyone saw them they'd only see the Potions Master going for a late night stroll around the castle.

It didn't take long to arrange her around the gargoyle at the foot of the stairs to Dumbledore's tower rooms and make a slight modification in her costume. Severus smirked as he returned to his quarters, the invisibility cloak folded and tucked inside his robe. She should be out of it until long after the rest of the castle awoke and the rumour mill would take the news that the Transfigurations Professor had been found in a drunken stupor wearing naught but a teddy decorated with little golden snitches on her way from the Headmaster's office and run with it.

He reminded himself to set some nasty traps and wards so no one could get into his rooms unless he let them in. i And I'd better come up with some false memories just in case /i . Dumbledore was sure to be livid and asking pointed questions come morning—that is, if he dared to leave his tower and face the knowing smirks of the entire student body.

A month later, Dumbledore invited him to another card game.

"I really don't think that would be wise, Albus. You surely don't want to have a repeat of last month's fiasco, do you? I really don't think it would be possible to _Obliviate_ the entire school if anything _untoward_ should happen." Severus reached casually for his goblet of pumpkin juice as he watched the changing expressions on Dumbledore's face out of the corner of his eye.

"Hmmm, I suppose you're right, Severus. I really must speak to Minerva about her drinking…"

The Potions Master choked on his pumpkin juice as the Headmaster looked consideringly at Professor McGonagall, his gazing ending up on the bit of cleavage that appeared above the neckline of her robes.

_Now I'm going to have to _Obliviate_ myself to get that image out of my mind. Maybe I should have stuck with Voldemort after all… _


End file.
